Sunday, March 22, 2009

Worst Movie Ever?

I have a lot of news to post about this awesome past week, but let me get this out of the way.

I finally have an informed opinion...

Could it be the worst movie ever? There are SO many things wrong with this film, I don't even know where to start. That script! That acting! That direction! Those bad cameos and inside jokes! What ever were they thinking? *sigh* It was even worse than I had anticipated. Once or twice it seemed like they were trying to actually make these bland, one-dimensional drips into interesting characters, but you can only do so much when the source material is so rubbish to begin with. So many times my jaw just dropped and my eyes were wide at the artlessness of it all. And I know there's a lot of bad cinema out there, but what concerns me is the hype and undeserved attention this particular franchise is getting. Even the demographic of swooning fangirls must have some sense of good artistic taste! Here's hoping that New Moon will flop miserably before the dismal final two stories ever are transferred to screen.

The company was good, though, and honestly, that's the only thing that could possibly have persuaded me to watch it, although my morbid sense of curiosity would have to have been satisfied eventually. I'm still a little embarrassed that I even saw it, but I guess it's now or never, I sort of thought to myself. Turns out never would actually have been better.

And no, it wasn't even worth it for any possible LOLz it could have provided. Sad story.


  1. The sad thing is, it had potential to at least be kind of cool! But it was so poorly made, I couldn't look past it. What got me the most, though, was the bad-80's-horror-movie-music constantly playing the whole time. You know, with those little guitar bowowowows. Sigh...

  2. I still maintain the movie was better than the book in some ways! Still not like...good or great or anything, but better.

    And the gazebo was pretty! Pretty!

    Otherwise...yes. It was fun to see all your reactions firsthand.

  3. I will give you that, it was better "in some ways" than the novel, but really... Isn't that kind of like saying that one rotten piece of fruit is better than another rotten piece of fruit because it's not *quite* as rotten? Like, a few days less rotten? But they're both still rotten!

  4. Well, I'll have you know that WE had fun watching it last night. My husband and I Mystery-Science-Theater-3000'd it the entire way through.

    And. I'm so sorry to say that this is not the worst movie ever made. I really wish it were, but I have suffered through worse. All The Pretty Horses? You can't even MST3K that one.

  5. Ha ha, good point Kenna, this movie lends itself perfectly to constant simultaneous ridicule. And I have seen All the Pretty Horses, but you see, the difference is that movie doesn't pretend to be some brilliant romantic thriller or worse yet (*shudder*), "a full-blown pop culture phenomenon."

  6. I heard there was a pretty hot kiss in there somewhere . . . could it be they all forgive poor artistic detail for the mushiness of it all?