This is our household paper cutter.
This is my left thumb.
After 25 years of warnings to avoid each other, they finally just couldn't stay apart anymore. (Photo was the morning after.)
There I was innocently helping prepare our wedding announcements with Julie when I felt sudden and painful slice on my poor digit. I held onto it in my fist, afraid to look at the damage (honestly, I think the sight of a mangled body part is worse for me than actually feeling it), then finally examined it. A decent portion of my thumb was nearly severed, holding on by just one little edge. It didn't seem serious enough to seek medical attention, so I just clipped the fingernail off, folded the flap of skin back into place and put a good number of band-aids over it until it stopped bleeding. Really, in the end, I was more worried about the blood on my khaki shorts, which Julie was able to skillfully remove. I also hope that it's back to normal before mid-August, and that the nail grows back naturally.
I still can't find the newer, sliding paper-cutter, but I have a newfound respect for this one. You think it's an old, dull blade, but it still does its job.